I have learned a lot about myself in the past few days. I hate looking back on things and situations and feeling like I should have known better or should have guarded myself better.... but I do know that from these times, much can be learned. I learned what true friendship really is and should be. I have learned how I am a good friend and also how I am an awful friend. I need to love people more. Especially those people who are not really on the top of my list to try and love. I want friendships that are true. Not shallow. I want to use wisdom in what I say. I have felt this week the pain of looking from the outside in. Wanting to be a part of something but knowing there is no way I can or ever really truly will be a part. I now know how many others feel. None of this may makes sense to you who are reading this, but it makes perfect sense to me. I have been a bit of a fool. I hate that. It makes me angry. Now I need to learn from this. I am in the process of learning those lessons but have been more to walk through.

Did I mention how badly I am ready to move? :)